As an American Woman, How My Life Changed After Marrying a Pakistani Man
I’ve been subjected to several kinds of people and also have undergone a plethora of scenarios that somebody raised and brought up in Pakistan may have. For this reason, you can imagine why marrying a Pakistani guy — somebody who has lived thirty decades of his life in Pakistan — hasn’t been a stroll in the park.
Being elevated and brought up in the USA, I’ve been through life somewhat differently than my counterparts in Pakistan.
This doesn’t mean marrying somebody from the USA could have been any simpler, because each relationship has its ups and downs, but all these are merely the differences we’ve got and need to face nearly each and every moment.
Before you begin thinking my jewel of a husband forces me to wear shalwar kameez, you’re definitely incorrect. It’s really quite the reverse. It’s instilled in me concerning what sort of event requires which outfit. So, when my husband informs me to wear a t-shirt around his family, it makes me uneasy. I’ve always been taught to wear a dupatta around my grandparents and family, therefore his actions of needing me to feel comfortable in what I wear doesn’t equate to me wearing western clothing everywhere I go.
Up until two decades before, I had long hair for so long as I can recall. Then 1 day I sliced them off. It felt like a burden was lifted from my shoulders figuratively and literally. That is, before a couple of days after, once I started to miss my hair. I might have ordered a lot of extensions to fix the harm, but I wasn’t pleased until everything grew back.
Only a couple of days before, I had been looking through my old photos and attracted up cutting my hair short again. My husband needed to have nothing to do with that dialog. That might have to do with his private needs, however, the background will not play a role in why he believes that way.
Assessing the family bloodline.
I can’t blame my husband for wanting kids shortly after Shaadi since there’s pressure from his parents to prolong the family bloodline. In addition to that, though the vast majority of women in Pakistan are taught to concentrate on family life and provide their husbands’ undivided attention, it does not necessarily work that way. My husband knows that my profession is rough and that it’s extremely valuable to me. This often means working overtime nearly daily.
There are times when he just overlooks my head and asks me to come back home early to spend time with him which can be impossible at this stage in my profession. The innovative shift in people’s thinking about women at work in Pakistan helps to know that there are additional things other family and housework.
Daily telephone calls
of our infants had kids within the first couple of decades of marriage. His outlook on this subject has shifted since he understands life in the USA is a little more complex than he may have believed and that I’m somewhat too young right now to take care of myself along with yet another thing.
I adore my in-laws and maintain no sympathy in their opinion. My problem is that this innovation is known as the mobile phone. I’d 9.99 times out of 10 would rather grab in person and have a meaningful dialogue than run-of-the-mill telephone calls in which there are relationship problems the majority of the time.
As my husband speaks with his parents in Pakistan on a daily basis, I’m invited to talk to them that frequently too, and that’s something I don’t appreciate. It doesn’t have anything to do with my in-laws. It’s everything to do with these bothersome connection issues.
Getting nagged about private options — like how much makeup I wish to use
Men, generally speaking, can’t deal with the assurance in a girl that comes with wearing makeup.
It is bothersome, and I figure they will never receive it.
I can’t recall the last time that I wore jewelry let alone costly, gold jewelry since chances are that I will discard it. Subsequently, World War III will take place since I dropped his nani’s Shaadi ka necklace, that’s the last thing that he had of hers. How about not asking me to wear golden ki jewelry next time we’re moving someplace?
After Nikkah what’s permitted and proper. Even though I have never asked my husband to have a make-out session at the midst of a mall, he shies away at the smallest kinds of PDA. Like come on, don’t walk five feet away from me like you’re my bodyguard.
The entire,“Shaadi ke Baad karlena” notion is a lie
I’ve waited my entire life in order to openly go wherever I need without the thousand questions that come along with that. So now that I’m married, I ought to be able to do that, right? Wrong. Because he cares just a bit too much about exactly what my parents will believe if we remain out a moment beyond 9:30 pm, our date nights frequently end suddenly with him racing for home at an”appropriate” time. Next time your parents’ state Shaadi Ke Baad jo marzi karlena, don’t consider them.
Everybody’s married life differs, and it’s normal for two human beings to get their own individual remarks. All these are merely the post-marriage adventures that I thought were worth sharing.